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Plot[]

There is a new kiddie at Crappy Town Junior High. He is in Ms. Android's classroom. Ms. Android introduces Michael, the new kid. However, there is some pretty big yelling. Kirby went to Mrs. AMP's room and pressed all the emergency shutoff buttons, turning off the power and water in Mrs. AMP's classroom. Mrs. AMP also couldn't pay the lighting bill because Miss Robot always steals her checks, so the lights are off. After that, it's time for second period. Miss Robot introduces herself to Michael, saying there is a big evil in the school. Michael gets a bit worried and asks what the evil is. Miss Robot then points at Miss Robot 2.0. and says she is the evil. Miss Robot 2.0. then says that she is better than her. Then Miss Robot says that Soda Pop is not a valid drug, as Miss Robot 2.0.'s favorite drug is Soda. Then Miss Robot 2.0. says that her calendar date is correct, as hers is 10000 B.C. Miss Robot says it is 2000 B.C. (Obviously, neither of these dates are correct.) Then they get into a pillow fight. Michael gets his stuff for second period.

In second period, Mrs. AMP introduces Michael to the class. She asks if he prefers Michael or Mike. Kirby suggests the name Fuckface. Mrs. AMP tells him to shut up and starts her lesson. They are learning on how to save the Polar Bear species, and they are going to write a paper, and need 50 notecards and 5 sources. Kirby says we should bomb Antarctica so there are no Polar Bears left and no way to save them, so no paper for Kirby. Mrs. AMP says that there are Polar Bears in places like Alaska. They look for facts on reliable sources. Kirby goes to MissRobot.gov and finds useful facts. He suggests it to Mikey, and since it's .gov it should be reliable. He finds some facts.

  • The Polar Bear's scientific name is FUCKYOU
  • The Polar Bear lives in Mars
  • Polar Bears are actually robots made by ISIS
  • Polar Bears being extinct will help seals. #SAVETHESEALS
  • Polar Bears are not threatened, they are just bears with white paint.
  • Kirby has killed 900000 polar bears
  • Polar Bears diet consists of weed and alcohol.
  • Polar Bears are wanted by North Korea for stealing a Kim il sung statue worth 2 cents made out of paper and wood.

Naturally, he doesn't believe any of these. Kirby says that they are very reliable facts. Michael recognizes that Miss Robot is the teacher who fought with a Blue clone of herself, which Kirby verifies and says Miss Robot is his very sexy friend. She did great things like destroying the twin towers on 9-11 because those places were hellholes and also does drugs a lot. Michael goes to a reliable source instead.

Trivia[]

The name is similar to The New Kid in Skool, another story.

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